I am not concerned that you have fallen. I am concerned that you arise.
– Abraham Lincoln
My original post can be found on: http://globeoflove.com/self-improvement/mastering-growth-mindset-learn-fail-better
Life is like a heart rate monitor. It’s a constant beep of ups and downs, it’s a shift between successes and failures. But that’s why this journey called ‘life’ is real: it’s human to fail. We fail in the small things: staying on a diet and quitting smoking. Well, I just opened a box of chocolates I wanted to give as a present! We fail in the larger things: overcoming an addiction or finding employment. We fail for a lifetime, by hanging onto obsessions.
On this monitor, the downs are also warnings sometimes. But why are you scared? In every single fluctuation there’s an opportunity for growth. We can’t avoid failure, but we can learn to fail better.
So let’s take the steps up the ‘mastering the growth mindset’ ladder together:
1. Let’s admit that we fail. There’s nothing to be scared or ashamed of. It’s a normal part of life and as such, we should recognise failure as a common phenomenon. We can’t escape from it in the same way we can’t escape from burning our dinner or spilling drinks sometimes. In other words, we should remember that we are not alone – everyone fails.
There are actually many famous people that can prove that failure is a necessary part of success. We fail. So what? We are not perfect robots. The beauty is in our attempt and determination to keep trying. You see successful people on TV? Who cares? Don’t forget that most of it is a cover and that the secret of being successful is in our strength to get up after the fall.
2. We should look into our souls carefully. Yoga, relaxation, treats for the body; anything that we’ll help us get to know our mind. A common psychological reaction is often to blame others or external factors. While it’s important not to keep guilt or shame in our hearts, it’s crucial to take responsibility. That’s part of becoming an adult. That’s also the way to recognise our weakness and grow in the process. Until then, it is impossible to move onto the next step, which is…
3. Let go of the factors outside our control. It takes a lot of courage but we should learn to leave things we cannot change in the past. Don’t hang on to obsessions. It might be scary, but let yourself embrace a new goal. You didn’t get the job you wanted? Let it go and don’t lose the opportunity to get into the next company that offers you a better position NOW.
4. Last but not least, we should remember that we grow through pain. Without pain, we can’t master the art of failure. And in these instances, we should forgive ourselves and not isolate ourselves from the others. Because even the best surgeon cannot operate successfully on their own. We need people to share with: family, colleagues, friends and partners. They make us successful because they love us. It’s the love in our life that makes sense of our failings.
Because failure is a necessary part of that exciting journey that has one destination: mastering the growth mindset. Don’t forget that no child has given up on walking after falling a hundred times. With time they just learn to fail better and eventually they start walking.
As long as our heart rate monitor works, there’s always hope.